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Post by The Doctor on Jan 11, 2010 15:48:11 GMT -7
Cardiff, in the rain. The Doctor felt as though he was still wet from the lake where he'd lost Sway...
The Doctor realised that there were tears in his eyes, or was that just the rain? He wiped his knuckles over his eyes anyway, glancing back at the open doors of his TARDIS, the warm and comforting green and gold glow of his beloved ship... and he turned away, pointing his screwdriver behind him to shut the door. He strode out into the downpour, his coat becoming more and more sodden with every step across the puddled ground, stepping straight into a shallow pool, water flooding over the top of his Converse.
Images still in his mind, Sway being pulled under the water, him running into the lake, knowing it was too late. Pulling her from the water, trying desperately to bring her back to life, knowing he couldn't. He couldn't save her. She shouldn't have died. He shouldn't have taken her on board the TARDIS. It was his fault. It was all his fault.
"I'm sorry." he murmured under his breath, looking out in the direction of the docks where he'd first met her "I'm so sorry..."
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Owen Harper
Torchwood
Look im alive......... Again
Posts: 361
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Post by Owen Harper on Jan 11, 2010 16:09:59 GMT -7
Owen had been in the hub for a while just thinking things over when he got an urge to go outside although he didn't know why, it was like something was pulling him and his mind seemed to know the way. He left torchwood and walked straight onto the streets where people were running past him with newspapers on their heads to protect themselves from the rain. Typical people were scared of water when aliens existed, the comment made Owen laugh to himself as he turned a sharp left to walk.
He trusted his hands in the pockets of his jacket and looked upward, letting the rain fall down his cheeks. He could see a soft glint on the drops and the rain was always kind of soft, it didn't seem to be the hard rain that actually hurt but a softer rain that just made you soaking wet. As the medic was thinking of all of these things he found himself near the lake and saw a male figure in the sea. "What the hell is he doing?" he muttered to himself.
The male walked towards him as he saw his clothes, they looked slightly familiar although he couldn't place them or see their face. Then again his blackouts had made him see things and think things that couldn't be real so he just shook his head and carried on walking past with his hands still in his pockets. However he couldn't explain why he did but he turned round and ran towards the man in the water, he held out his hand and smiled. "Hey cmon look its cold, don't go in there" They almost looked like they were going to drown themselves and he couldn't let that happen. "I'm Owen Harper"
He didn't know what else to do but introduce himself plus the water level was getting higher and the rain was hitting harder. A storm of some sorts was coming. He had to get the male away from the water and fast.
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Post by The Doctor on Jan 11, 2010 16:27:54 GMT -7
The water wasn't deep, only just wetting the bottom of his long coat, a few inches up his trousers.
"Bit of rain never hurt anyone." he said aloud, distantly.
It hadn't been the rain that had killed Sway. Nor the lake she had drowned in. It had been the creatures that lurked within the mass of water. That had killed her. She was so young.
He looked around, not really registering the man in front of him until he heard the name. Owen Harper... Owen Harper! He focused in on the man through the rain.
"I'm... the Doctor." he said automatically, his voice tailing slowly off, staring at Owen.
He welcomed the distraction, but... did Owen even recognise him? Did he know who he was?
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Owen Harper
Torchwood
Look im alive......... Again
Posts: 361
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Post by Owen Harper on Jan 11, 2010 16:40:50 GMT -7
Owen nodded as the male said his name and the medic got an instant flashback, his face was familiar, too familiar to be someone else that looked similar plus the name, Doctor he could remember thinking that it was a weird name. "Do i know you?" he asked with a large frown "We met before?" The first comment was a question whereas the second was more of a statement as Owen knew it was true. It had to be true, it just had to be.
"Doctor?" he muttered. Another image fluttered in his mind as he said the name out loud the word police, but he wasn't a cop. Owen could tell that by what he was wearing and how he was acting. Instantly he felt responsible for the man almost like he owed him something so he placed his hand on the mans back in order to lead him away from the waves which were now reaching Owen. He looked down and saw that he was wearing near jeans and slightly gritted his teeth but took a deep breath and smiled.
The medic began to lead the Doctor away from the lake, one step at a time, he was clearly distracted and distressed by something so Owen didn't want to force him into doing anything. He looked and saw that the place was pretty deserted, a bit of rain and people run, aliens attack and they stay to watch. He shrugged at the though before looking again at the male. "Where do you live?" he asked with a frown, like he should slightly know the answer.
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Post by The Doctor on Jan 11, 2010 16:54:37 GMT -7
"I... I've met lots of people." he said evasively, not entirely sure why he didn't just tell Owen the truth.
"Yup, that's me, the Doctor." he said in a far more cheerful voice than he felt, and far less convincing than he intended.
He still sounded like a man in pain, as he was, still grieving. He knew that he would eventually bury that because he had to, keep going because it was necessary, but never forget her.
He remembered everybody, that was the problem. 900 years of it, the loss and the pain.
Like a child, he let Owen guide him along, walking obediently in step with Owen in slow shuffling steps, his hair plastered flat to his head and feeling the cold water now soaking through his shirt. He shivered despite himself, not actually cold due to his accelerated Time Lord metabolism.
"Live?" he repeated "Oh, I suppose... back there. My TARDIS." he said, tilting his head back and jerking his thumb towards the blue box.
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Owen Harper
Torchwood
Look im alive......... Again
Posts: 361
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Post by Owen Harper on Jan 11, 2010 17:11:46 GMT -7
As soon as the Doctor said the six letter word, TARDIS Owen got another flashback of a blue police box that was bigger on the inside then it was the outside. He then followed the males thumb to see a blue police box, one that he had seen in his flashback, they were exactly the same in every detail. It was like a bad case of Deja Vu yet he still wasn't sure why.
The medic led the other male to the police box as more rain fell down from the sky onto them. He reached it and took his hand off of the Doctor to open the door which he pushed open. The layout was still familiar to Owen and he helped the Doctor in before looking at the ceiling of the room. He saw a metal helmet fall from it and saw it being placed on his own head making Owen frown.
He then looked at the Doctor with a smile before turning to the door, he felt like he was intruding and that he shouldn't be there. After all he was in someones house, well he didn't know exactly what to call it more like a ship then anything but he ignored his own thoughts to speak."I should go" he said pointing the door "As long as your ok?"
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Post by The Doctor on Jan 11, 2010 17:20:06 GMT -7
Maybe he did remember, if only subconsciously? In any case, Owen didn't seem surprised at the interior of the TARDIS and although he might be imagining it, the Doctor could swear he spotted a gleam of recognition in Owen's eyes.
The Doctor tugged his long coat off, hanging it on the coatstand to dry and shaking his head like a dog to rid it of some of the water, his hair now sticking up at bizarre angles instead of lying flat and wet.
"No!" he protested quickly "I mean, yes I'm okay, I'm fine, but you don't have to go, you're perfectly welcome to... stay until the rain stops. If you want. I mean, if you want to go, don't let me keep you..."
He told himself that he wanted to be sure how much Owen remembered, and to help if he could, if anything was wrong. But he knew that actually, he just really didn't want to be alone right now.
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Owen Harper
Torchwood
Look im alive......... Again
Posts: 361
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Post by Owen Harper on Jan 11, 2010 17:38:32 GMT -7
Owen looked at the Doctor before walking towards the door and seeing the rain fall even heavier. He then smiled as he heard the man speak to him from the TARDIS. No one had spoke to him like that in a very long time. He shut the door and walked over to the Doctor before smiling at the male. "I guess i can stay" he said with a wink. "Do you normally bring people you don't know here?" Owen laughed as he asked the question with his dirty mind twisting what he was saying and making it obvious that he was doing so. He knew that he kind of knew the Doctor but couldn't remember fully how so maybe they were different.
He looked at the man before taking his jacket off and hanging it by the Doctors coat. Owen stood with his hands in his pockets wondering what to do before walking over to the console of the ship. He began to look at the buttons and gently brushed a few as he remembered he shapes and symbols. He just hoped he didn't press or break anything.
Without warning Owen spun round and looked at a chair which was close to where he stood. He then remembered screaming and took a deep in take of air before returning to look at the other male. "Sorry um just saw something that surprised me" he said, trying to cover up his gasp and fail miserably.
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Post by The Doctor on Jan 11, 2010 17:51:22 GMT -7
The Doctor relaxed slightly when Owen didn't leave. He just felt that, left alone, he was bound to think too much. Not just Sway, but Rose, Astrid, Adric, Jenny, the Master, his people back on Gallifrey, all that he had lost. And then there was Owen, who he had saved. He focused on Owen, that damp glint of hope, that shred of human light.
Despite himself, he found himself smile weakly at Owen's joke, his cheeks flushing slightly even under the cold rain and tears still wet on his cheeks.
"Not like that. Not usually, anyway." he replied with the tiniest of grins and a touch of his usual spark.
He watched Owen curiously, wondering if he did recall being in the Doctor's ship or whether it was just vague memories. He'd told Owen that the amnesia would fade and he'd assumed it would, but he hadn't been certain. But visual triggers, perhaps they would help to set off Owen's subconscious. In that case, he didn't want to bombard the younger man with painful memories all at once, but from the look on Owen's face, he was at least remembering something unpleasant.
"What do you remember?" he asked seriously.
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Owen Harper
Torchwood
Look im alive......... Again
Posts: 361
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Post by Owen Harper on Jan 11, 2010 18:07:22 GMT -7
Owen grinned at the Doctor when he went along with his joke although he seemed to need more cheering up then that. He could tell straight away that he was a great guy so he didn't have any problems being himself around the male. That was until he asked him what he remembered and he knew exactly what the Doctor meant.
He looked at the floor before looking straight into the Doctors eyes. "Terror, screaming, pain, you helping me some how, the TARDIS, a helmet" he said reading them off like a list. He was scared, he didn't want to be there anymore, he didn't know if the Doctor was the person that hurt him. He hoped not but people hurt him who were close to him so he couldn't let is guard down fully, not yet anyway. His terror showed even though he tried to hid it, he had to be strong. "Why did you hurt me?" he asked his voice weak and jittery. He held his head as he remembered his pain "It hurt Doc" he almost said in a whisper as a single tear fell from his face and rolled down his cheek.
Owen backed away into a corner light a scared cat as he looked around the TARDIS. He remembered everything and it wasn't the Doctors fault. "I'm sorry" he told the Doctor through a few tears "It wasn't you in was me, you helped me, I'm sorry" The male sobbed gently wiping his eyes
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Post by The Doctor on Jan 11, 2010 18:20:03 GMT -7
"I'm sorry, I didn't want to hurt you, I only wanted to help." he said, meeting Owen's eyes in return, his own wide and honest.
He always just wanted to help. The road to hell, so they said, is paved with good intentions. Who said that? He racked his brains dimly, but could only come up with Madonna. But it was the same point no matter who had said it. He tried to make things right, and people got hurt. No matter how hard he tried, no matter how much he felt he was helping, the innocent still got hurt.
He moved closer, almost in tears himself as he watched Owen, forcing himself to concentrate only on Owen. He understood why Owen wouldn't want to be near him, with the jumble of memories he had and if all he remembered was pain and confusing snatched images. But hopefully, the Doctor could put that right if something was wrong.
He crouched down on the floor, moving as slowly and carefully as he would have when approaching a real wild animal or scared creature, one hand outstretched in front of him, an offering rather than a threat, fingertips curved out towards Owen, trying to show some kind of comfort, offer his support, show that he hadn't meant to hurt him.
The tears sprung unbidden in his eyes as he watched Owen, and knew with utter certainty that he had done something right, this man was alive now, surely that was right, surely that was something?
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Owen Harper
Torchwood
Look im alive......... Again
Posts: 361
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Post by Owen Harper on Jan 11, 2010 18:36:07 GMT -7
Owen couldn't control his body but as the Doctor crept closer to him, the medic craved more and more for comfort which by the look of the Doctor he also needed. The medic burst forward as soon as the other male was close enough, wrapping his arms around his waist for a tight embrace. "I'm sorry, thank you, you helped me" he cried to the male "Your the only one that did and has for a long time"
He had never admitted it to anyone but with this male here and now, the pair of them together formed a unit with both of them having a mutual understanding, they were both helping each other no matter what they had to do. Owen still held close to the Doctor and didn't let go for a few minutes, cherishing the comfort that he had longed for, for years. He couldn't help but hold on, it had been so long since he had been loved by anyone and in truth thats all he wanted out of life, all he wanted.
The torchwood medic had his eyes closed and tears slowly streaming underneath them but they were ceasing now as he held on to a person that he now deeply cared about. He had to throw away his pride and his guts as he spoke to the Doctor again. "I...." he swallowed deeply "Love you" Owen meant every word, it might not be proper love but for Owen there was definitely some kind of love shared between the two.
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Post by The Doctor on Jan 12, 2010 5:12:12 GMT -7
Surprised, the Doctor let Owen hug him, wrapping his arms around the other man to pull him closer. He felt that Owen needed it, and the Doctor needed it too. The comfort. The closeness. The... the understanding.
"It's okay, shhh..." he soothed, holding Owen close in his arms, curling one hand around the nape of his neck just above his spine, burying his fingers in Owen's hair.
He rocked Owen gently as though calming a child, focusing on giving attention and care to the other man. Deep down, he knew he was giving the kind of comfort he longed for himself, needed. He got that where he could, in brief hugs and spending time with people; having his companions around him helped. But sometimes he just needed to held and told that everything was all right, like he did for Owen right now.
He turned, keeping hold of Owen, leaning against the warm organic wall of the TARDIS. Although he was possibly thinner than Owen- neither of them were exactly candidates for body builder of the year- he was taller than the other man, but was able to arrange his limbs comfortably into a sitting position and allowing Owen to stay close to him.
At the sound of those words, the words he could never bring himself to say, that it had been too late for him to say to Rose, he froze in place, shocked. He didn't actually believe it, not really. Owen barely knew him, and the Doctor was wary of letting his emotions run away with him. People got hurt, people like Sway... he'd agreed to let her on his TARDIS because he was lonely, and he liked her, and he liked the company.
He stroked Owen's hair absently, blinking back the tears and just letting himself enjoy the contact and comfort, the warmth that Owen was giving out, shifting closer to him like a moth seeking flame. They'd both got wet in the rain but the Doctor was soaked to the skin and he paused apologetically when he realised he was doing a good job of dampening Owen's clothes as well.
"I'm getting you wet." he murmured, shifting back slightly.
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Owen Harper
Torchwood
Look im alive......... Again
Posts: 361
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Post by Owen Harper on Jan 12, 2010 10:38:14 GMT -7
Owen hit himself as soon as he had said those three words that were thrown about so easily without being meant but when the medic used them he meant it although he was regretting it now. He was glad that the Doctor covered the moment up and changed the subject letting Owen to rub the tears from his eyes. He couldn't really care that he had been crying anymore, even the strongest men cried so Owen should be able to.
He felt the Doctor lean back from him which caused Owen to do the same, almost like a mirror image. "Well I'm wet already so who cares?" he told the male smiling until he realized how the words could be twisted. So the male decided to change the subject as quickly as possible. "Enough of me" said the male wiping the last tears away. "Why where you out there alone? Are you ok?"
The medic usually wasn't so open but since being revived he was different, he was still Owen but he enjoyed life a lot more. He had trouble at first having to breathe again, after being alive again, which was difficult after not doing it for a while but he had mastered it now.
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Post by The Doctor on Jan 12, 2010 11:27:20 GMT -7
The Doctor was almost disappointed when Owen pulled back and he lost the warmth and comfort, but scooted back to lean against the tangle of warm pipes running along the bottom of the TARDIS wall, resting against that and relaxing against the thrumming heat of the ship system.
"I suppose."
Although Owen's jacket had protected him from most of the rain and he hadn't been there for as long, while the Doctor found his suit plastered to him like a second skin, the tie trailing like a sodden snake. He wrung some of the water out of it and then let it fall back onto his chest with a small sigh of defeat.
"Me? I'm fine. Peachy. Great. I was just having a good old detox. Rainwater, good for the skin, and good for my hair..." he insisted cheerfully, his happy tone a little transparent.
It was obvious that no, he wasn't all right. But he didn't know if he could talk to anybody about it. The pain was still too recent, the grief still too much.
The word 'alone' resonated in his mind more than he felt Owen had meant it. He was alone, so very alone. He had nobody. Anybody who was around him got hurt. Maybe he really was cursed
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